Religion and wedding issue please help?

July 3rd, 2011

I woudve wrote wedding dilemma but this issue will affect our marriage as well. I am 21 my fiance is 22 we have been together 3 years and have a four month old son. We have been engaged for two years and really want to get married this year. The issue is my fiance is catholic and I am christian. Before we had our son we agreed on raising our son christian since I was more involved in the church and with god. Now that we are planning the wedding our difference of religion is causing problems. He wanted to get married in a catholic church and I didn’t mind since I just wanted to marry in a church but we found out that I would have to go to classes and promise to raise our son catholic which I won’t since I am not. I won’t lie to the priest. Aside his parents said if we don’t marry in a catholic church then they wouldn’t come(i suspect this is why my fiance is so adamant on a catholic wedding). So naturally our next option was a christian church but my fiance says if it’s not catholic than he just wants to get married by court. I am so hurt. I waited so long for a nice wedding and now I don’t know how I can have one. Please help me wwith any advice on how to fix this.

6 Responses to “Religion and wedding issue please help?”

  1. Brandon says:

    you should have the wedding of your dreams…i bet you deserve it, but reality has kicked in….i suggest that you both get married by court therefore you wont be pressured to go against your faith….or religion.after the court you both should have a get together or regular wedding what is best for both of you and don’t let people throw you down by saying they wont go to your wedding, their not the ones getting married.this is going to be your day.remember that whatever you chose god will never leave your side.

  2. Liz says:

    A Christian, by definition, is a person who believes that the historic person Jesus of Nazareth was not just a man but in fact the son of God. What do you think Catholics are, if not Christian? Please learn the meanings of words before using them. And in the interest of the next generation, ensure that your son gets an education.

    As for your question, a civil ceremony at the court house seems the perfect compromise to me, since both your side of the family and your fiance seem stuck in their ways and unwilling to be the least bit flexible.

  3. Kei Kei says:

    i would get married in a hotel ball room so there wont be no fuss or fighting.

  4. Alison says:

    Why don’t you have a wedding in a garden or some place that has meaning for the two of you, with a celebrant? That way you can have a beautiful location (instead of a courthouse) and not have to lie to the priest.

    I am Anglican, my partner is Catholic.. I know his parents will expect him to get married in a Catholic church, but this will upset my parents, and no matter what sort of church I get married in, my dad’s partner will not come. So I understand the issues you face. I do not believe in what Catholics believe in, and to a degree I don’t believe in some things that most Anglicans believe in.. so we’ll just have to compromise like everyone does in a relationship.

    I seriously doubt that his parents will miss his wedding, even if it isn’t in a Catholic church. Most parents say these things to bluff and get their own way. He needs to explain to them that you will not lie to the priest, and would appreciate if they would respect both your wishes.

    I don’t know that I can give you any more advice than that.. I hope that everything goes smoothly!

  5. Perse says:

    With a child out of wedlock neither of you is that Christian. Drop the act.

    I agree, a courthouse wedding asap would be best for your situation.

  6. The Original GarnetGlitter says:

    You can have a nice ‘court’ wedding dear….find an officiate who is willing to go to the reception venue to marry you two and select a venue that can accommodate the wedding and reception..many can…..then sometime down the line you & your fiance can have a blessing of the marriage ceremony-no reason why a christian minister can’t bless a marriage between a catholic and non-catholic…

    if his parents boycott the wedding, well that’s on THEM & your fiance needs to learn that if he’s old enough to be married and a father, he’s old enough not to give in to emotional blackmail, which gives control of HIS LIFE to another-he is the master of his own life.

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