My fiance just left me?

November 1st, 2010

Ok So Im 20, shes 19. We dated for 4 1/2 years until we decided to get married. I proposed to her about a week ago but we were planning the wedding for June for the last couple months.

A couple days ago, we went into a counseling meeting and her parents were there. All of a sudden they say whats the rush, and my ex is saying that she feels that God is convicting her to not get married, and it would go against his will to get married. WTF? Then the counselors ask how im supporting her, and I said i had a job lined up, but everyone already knew I didnt have a job right away and we went on with the planning for the wedding.

Just kinda venting here, but a week after I propose and she says yes, she leaves me, kicks me out of her house, and doesnt talk to me. I know were done but any tips on how I can just not even think of her or get sad to think about her. I want to move on now and I know im young so everything is good, just what she did really hurt. Thanks everyone heres a pic of us

17 Responses to “My fiance just left me?”

  1. munkyboywndr says:

    It is a bit young for you two to tie the knot yet. Since you two were together for so long, it may take a really long time for you to get over her. Despite this, try to move on.

  2. psychosara007 says:

    She was afraid and not ready. Plain and simple. She probably said yes without thinking it through. If you still want to marry her, have a discussion work your plans out for the future and postpone the wedding for a while. Like Pre-Marriage counseling. She where her head is at after a while.

    Good Luck and hope this works out for you!

  3. Jaslyn says:

    I think it was because she was a bit caught up with fact that you wasn’t “financially” ready to give her, her dream wedding… I’m sorry to hear how she did that, but I think you can move on… your a handsome guy 🙂

  4. DR NEWMAN says:

    hey man.. i dunno what to say really..
    i feel your pain.
    best way to get over someone, is get under someone..
    your fiance is obviously lying…
    im sorry to hear it though and i wish you the very very best in the future.

  5. tooinvolved1 says:

    cute couple…go out with friends

  6. Kate says:

    going out will help you. noones expecting you to forget her so fast, its natural to be devasted and hurt ! look at other girls try to take your mind off her. dont jump into another relaitonship straight away as your not emotionaly ready yet, just try to have fun with your mates
    goodluck x

  7. champishere8180 says:

    Dang sorry bro, but it just takes some time, go hang out with friends, or kick it at thier house, worst thing is just sitting around cause u will think of her

  8. littlemitzi2003 says:

    sean – dont be nasty

    you remind me of my ex *no offence*

    it will be very heart breaking to get over her as you have been together for so long , the only thing i can suggest is try talking to other girls , try (im on there lol but just to look for frienships online) maybe that will take your mind off her , give it time . plus you both are very young to tie the knot , but loads of people do it

  9. Christopher says:

    That is a good thing that she left you. That means you can do better than her. Just to let you know she is engaged to me now.

  10. spankdady says:

    You know what dude…I’d rather a chick bail before the wedding than afterwards. I once had a fine a$$ chick I was shacking up with and she one day packed and took everything including my stuff. A month later I met a finer and more kinder chick. Everything happens for a reason. If I was already taken I wouldn’t be with the one I have today. If she got cold feet don’t sweat it…..better safe then sorry!

  11. neinei says:

    What she did was wrong. She should have told you in advance that she thought getting married was a bit too rushed. I know my boyfriend is going to be proposing to me soon too, yet I’m second guessing myself if I really want to. She may have over panicked and left. Her parents may also have been a factor, and again, this may be part of the ‘counseling’ like a test or something.

    What I would do to try not to make yourself sad is to try to be around others, like your guy friends, and always try to keep yourself busy. This is going to be harder than it sounds. What I usually do to stop thinking is just sleep. I think it would be too soon to go back into the dating world. You can always play sports and start new hobbies just to let time pass by. Do something in music.

    I give you props for hanging in there, and I hope everything works out!

  12. Chef Quiet says:

    I think marriage counseling is just a bad idea all together. Also, 4 1/2 years is a long enough time to decide whether or not you want to be married. A very long time. I think she is just really upset and this is a way for her to vent by herself, there is no way she doesn’t love you, she is in love with you. I mean, if she was crying and angry at you, it was because she loved you. I say, maybe do some things that you need to get accomplished like you said a job and all that stuff and then give her some time and just apologize to her and do sweet things, like send her things and then you two go out and talk about it and make up. She still loves you man, deeply, she is just upset, no worries.

  13. NYMOM says:

    Ok, her parents did not want her to get married and were probably worried about how you would be able to support the two of you. That is a very normal parental response and it is logical. Your ex, on the other hand did not think the whole marriage “thing” through and her parents did influence her judgment not to. I personally think you two are way too young, especially nowadays. Couples NEED to finish school, graduate or just establish themselves financially…and these are hard times to do that.
    I do not see why you two cannot put off the wedding for a couple of years, until you are BOTH more mature and established. You have to love each other obviously, to want to be married, right? I have to say, you two are an adorable couple. (maybe I should not be saying that, but you are both quite attractive). If there is a solid and real relationship between you the wait will be worth it. This is my suggestion, because I do not know if she has totally broke it off with you completely, which really would be kind of heartless. If you really love her, call her and talk. Communication is the best way to settle things and see exactly what is on your minds and in your hearts. Good luck to you…..

  14. Nate says:

    Hey bro, this must be shit for you and its really sad i’m sorry to hear about it. Sorry to say there is NO way to just get over someone when you were together for for four and a half years. Its going to take time a long time at that because you weren’t just dating you were engaged. Ride it out and think that you’ll find the right one in time. Hope this helps you realize its not just going to go away in a few days or weeks.
    Good Luck in the future!

  15. jessiex says:

    It sounds like she just was not ready for marriage and freaked out. Since you were with her for so long it may take a while to get over her. Try joining some community clubs or hanging out with friends to keep you from lingering on the past.

  16. Obzi says:

    I’ve been 3 twice (over my many, many years) and each time i thought each time it was going to be ‘the one’.

    For various reasons none of those worked out and number 4 was the one i eventually married, now 11yrs with 2 children.

    At the time of each one ending i was felt a little like you are now, but looking back i’m 1000% sure that none of them would have worked out.
    The fact i didn’t marry any of them was a very good move, looking back i’m sure you will feel the same.

  17. Yinxxx says:

    Nice picture, pretty girls can be rude sometimes but hey that’s her problem

    the phase u’r goign thru right now will gurt unfortunately it’ll take a logn time or depending on how strong u are, but when u heal, you’ll b a lot wiser and smarter and ur choice of marriage will be much more better and you’ll appreciate ur ex for breaking up with you.

    Don’t let ur ego coem into this, accept defeat and knows what goes aroudn comes around, so u’r bound for something good and she’ll get a taste of her own medicine too…

    hold no grudge, forive and forget, change soemthing about you, do something new, something u’ve never done since you’re FREE not…

    A change will do u good… but it’l still take a whiel to heal, but u must never give up…

    A girl who hurts u without feelig nsorry for u, is just not good enough…

    Look on the bright side, she didnt kick u out after 3 years of marriage when u have a baby and it’s too late to break up…

    be happy. God loves you.. when my ex dumped me, I found God. i can relate to u.

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