How do I incorporate being a virgin bride into my wedding festivities?

July 8th, 2011

I’m getting married soon and I’m very proud of the fact that I’m going to be a virgin on my wedding night. How do I make this knowledge a part of my wedding without being blunt and tacky about it? In Jessica Simpsons wedding the officiant announced it and made a huge deal about it during the vows, I want to avoid something like that but I do want everyone to know. Any ideas?
Everybody wears white nowadays so I don’t really see that as adequate.
Thanks for your responses but the question isn’t should I let people know its “how”. I have already made the decision that I want others to know so if you don’t agree with that decision then you answers aren’t really necessary, thanks anyway.
Just like you don’t care, I don’t care that you think its tacky 🙂

Announcing my virginity and killing my mother in no way can be compared so try again.

30 Responses to “How do I incorporate being a virgin bride into my wedding festivities?”

  1. Froggy says:

    You wear white. That’s the ONLY classy way to say it, period.

  2. eldots53 says:

    The white dress symbolizes virginity. Wear white.

  3. loves christmas lights says:

    This really isnt appropriate to make known in any sence, its between you and him. Yes it is very very honorable that you have waited. But really do you want anyone thinking about this, or focusing on the upcoming wedding and ceremony. I had no idea Jessica Simpson did that, sounds very inappropriate totally.
    As previously mentioned the white gown is the symbol, its just that noone has morals of that nature anymore and all wear white, except you, your did it and you have every right to be proud!!!!!!!

  4. allnaturalingredients says:

    Have giant posters of a phallus with that no smoking symbol over it. That should suffice. It may be blunt and tacky, but i think it’s b*d*ss

  5. MRS. MORENO 1/31/09!!! ♥ says:

    i am a virgin bride as well!!! i am so proud of it!!!!!!

    well for my wedding, my husband and i wrote our own vows together and he is saying that i have given him the greatest gift of all…. which is purity…. ♥ i love him so much… 🙂

    EDIT: Well, i said husband but he is really my fiance… or husband-to-be …but whatever…. 😛

  6. Debbie P says:

    Isn’t that something that should be between you and your fiance/new husband? Not everyone is going to want to know you remained a virgin.

  7. SirenSong says:

    Why? That isn’t something that is appropriate for public knowledge. It should be between you and your fiance, no one else.

    It was inappropriate at Jessica Simpson’s wedding as well.

    Blue has symbolized purity since the beginning of time so you could incorporate that somehow. White as a wedding color actually does not symbolize virginity, but rather wealth. Open a history book and read about Queen Victoria introducing the color in the mid1800s for that reason, not purity/virginity.

  8. CINDY H says:

    I think that announcing that it’s a virginal wedding is a bit tacky and TMI. Jessica Simpson was an idiot .
    Wear a white gown , that isn’t revealing , your white veil pulled over your face entering the church is a ritual that only a virgin bride can wear with pride and respect without being dishonest to the church she is entering . White flowers for your bouquet is another . Being a virgin on your wedding day is something to be proud of , and between you and your husband . You don’t have to broadcast it to everyone in church . They assume you are any way .

  9. Laredo says:

    Paint a sign on the back of your wedding dress saying, “I AM A VIRGIN.” Nobody but you gives a crap about personal matters like that. There is NO WAY you can make it known without being tacky.

  10. Leigha B says:

    As a wedding officiant, you are not the only bride I have heard this question from.

    How about incorporating a ritual into the ceremony something like this. Feel free to customize it to your own liking.

    Candle Lighting Ceremony

    (Note: This ceremony can be done with 4 candles, as its written here, or can be modified to use the Unity Candle, which has 3 candle.

    Within each human being burns the spark of the Divine. When two people love one another with devotion and freedom, they kindle the awareness of that spark in each other as nothing else quite can do. The lighted candle is symbolic of the cosmic creation and the light and truth in the human heart, mind and soul. Fire also symbolizes both purity and passion. Purity of body and purity of heart. Passion kept only for one another.

    Take into your beings the warmth, radiance and light that the divine flame represents. Let it light your way on the journey of life that you are about to embark on.

    In committing to one another today, in the spirit of being born new to one another, you kindle each other’s divine light and promise always to see that light in one another-to nurture and tend that divine flame in your partner as best you can each day-especially at the times it may be hardest to see, and the times your partner may doubt or forget the existence of that light within him-or herself.

    (Brides Name), take this candle now and symbolically enter the sacred trust to honor the divine spark in (Grooms Name) by lighting it from this candle representing the Divine Source. (She lights candle)

    (Grooms Name), take this candle now and symbolically enter the sacred trust to honor the divine spark in (Brides Name) by lighting it from this candle representing the Divine Source. (He lights candle)

    If at this time you wish to affirm your free choice to unite as partners in marriage, relinquish the purtity you have in body and in spirit to each other, and keep yourselves only unto each other, please light the unlit candle together now. (They light unlit candle together) As you bring your individual flames together to symbolically form the new and greater flame of your marriage, never forget that the light of your union is made up of your unique, individual expressions of light and is continually sustained and renewed by your connection to the Divine Spark, the eternal light of God.

    The candle you lit together symbolizes your marriage, your willingness to surrender to something greater than yourselves. May the light of your marriage, (Brides Name) and (Grooms Name), be a beacon in the night, a safe harbor from the storms of life. May your future be made infinitely brighter by the light and the love that you share.

    Let me know if I can help in any other way. You may contact me by visiting my blog at the address below.

  11. Good♥Gyrl says:

    Announcing it in any way is “blunt and tacky” (to use your words). Stating it during your vows or otherwise mentioning it is ridiculous, because this is something that should be known only to your finance, and maybe your parents/closest family members. There really is no need to state it. It would be the equivalent of throwing yourself a party because you donated a million dollars to a African Aid, wanting everyone to notice you for a “good work”. Being a virgin is something you’re supposed to do, especially if you did it for reasons of religion, etc. God does not consider this type of boasting appropriate.

    Instead of making some announcement, maybe wear a right-hand purity ring. A lot of people know what those are. This is if you must make an intimate decision public.

  12. mother shabubu says:

    I agree that this is between you and your fiance and not some trophy to wave around in front of everybody, that would seem tacky.
    Anyway, your closest friends probably know anyway,, right?

    You COULD try doing a chivary- it’s an old tradition where your bridesmaids and friends sneak off to your hotel room or wherever you’re spending your wedding night and spread flowers, joke items, whatever on the bed and all around. Then if they’re really obnoxious they hang around and make a bunch of noise and bang pots and pans and whatnot after you guys retire to your room, to interrupt you :).

  13. Magic 8 Ball BIRTHDAY BALL says:

    I think it is blunt and tacky to let everyone know that you are a virgin bride. Other than you, the only ones that need to know are God and your husband, and I am assuming your soon to be husband already knows. Show a little humility and don’t flaunt your virtue. Pride is not an asset according to God.

    EDIT: Post a sign on the church door that says “Me S is a VIRGIN!!! Be sure to congratulate her for her purity, because she is so proud that she has saved herself for marriage, like she is supposed to according to the Bible”.

    That should about do it. No matter how you do it, it will be tacky.

  14. Stiffler says:

    I really don’t think anyone wants or needs to know.

    Do you wear a purity ring. Perhaps you could mention in the ceremony that you remove your purity ring now to be replaced with your wedding ring.
    Then everyone will be thinking about what you plan to do that night. See how that works, you bring up your viginity in any way and people will think about you and your husband getting it on.

    I really think you should leave it out.

  15. HIS! says:

    http://www.projectwedding.com/wiki/show/true-love-waits-in-a-wedding-ceremony

    It’s a link to a suggested part of a wedding ceremony that was written for True Love Waits couples. And may I say congratulations and God Bless!

  16. Ndimakukonda says:

    First of all CONGRATULATIONS!! Not just on your forthcoming wedding but on remaining a virgin, that is such an admirable thing these days. It’s a shame more people don’t wait.

    The tradition is to wear PURE white, with a white veil. Use a 2 tier veil and wear it over your face until you have been pronounced man and wife, your husband then lifts it back to give you the first kiss as his wife. You could also carry a simple bouquet of white flowers also symbolising purity.

    As for a more noticeable declaration maybe you could include something like the following in the vows:

    “I (your name) have kept myself only for you (his name) for this time we are joined as man and wife.”

    Or have the priest/officiant say something like:

    “(Your name) and (his name) have, according to tradition/God’s law (depending on whether you have a faith), kept themselves pure until the time they are joined as man and wife…”

    All the best for your wedding and, once again, well done for not giving in to peer pressure!

  17. truefirstedition says:

    This is one of the tackiest things I’ve ever heard. If I were one of your guests, I would be completely uncomfortable that you were even bringing the topic up. Your sex life is no one’s business but your own.

  18. vpsinbad50 says:

    well aren’t we a little snippy .
    you get what you asked and that comes with opinions
    since you want to have ONLY response on how to announce your a virgin , leave a note on the pews and tell them to come to your house after the honeymoon and check out the soiled sheet .
    shi11y hillbilly jessica wannabe

  19. anteloopy says:

    you don’t. your sex life is private and it’s no one else’s business. it’d be really tacky to flaunt your sexual status like a badge of honor.

    also – white is NOT a symbol of purity; it amazes me how many people think something entirely inaccurate. white symbolizes wealth – see your queen elizabeth history. blue symbolizes purity. so if you really must parade your virginity around, wear a blue dress.

  20. S P says:

    “Thanks for your responses but the question isn’t should I let people know its “how”. I have already made the decision that I want others to know so if you don’t agree with that decision then you answers aren’t really necessary, thanks anyway.”

    Really? No one cares. It’s a bad idea and you shouldn’t do it. If you came on here asking how you can kill your mother, I wouldn’t give you advice on how to do it, I’d try to talk you out of it. You’re going to look tacky and pretentious if you announce your virginity at your wedding.

  21. Ms. X says:

    Why exactly do you feel the need to broadcast your virginity??? Your virginity is no one’s business but yours and your husband’s, along with the rest of your sex- or non-sex life. But you could wear a chastity belt to your wedding, have your husband unlock it in front of everyone, and toss it to the single women in lieu of the bouquet. That would get your point across.

    Also, you can do what they did in the old days. On your wedding night, hang the bloody sheet outside the door or window.

    P.S. In case I failed to get my point across above: You are putting your desire to broadcast your virginity above your guests’ discomfort and embarrassment about learning private details of your sex life. Your wedding is not the place for broadcasting or celebrating your virginity. Any mention of your virginity at your wedding is in and of itself tacky. Quite frankly, you would be putting on an egotistical display of “look at me, I’m a virgin” rather than being a gracious host and not making your guests uncomfortable.

    P.P.S. Well said, B. White below me.

    P.P.P.S. Garnet Glitter, I was ROFL with my eyes tearing at your response. I read it aloud to my husband, and he was ROFL too!

  22. Boston's says:

    Why would you want anyone to know? You want a medal or something?

  23. B. White says:

    Announcing your virginity is completely inappropriate. It is just as inappropriate as a non-virgin couple announcing their previous sex romps to their wedding guests. Your sex life, including your choice to wait until marriage, is personal.

    There is no appropriate way to discuss your sex life at your wedding. I’m assuming that you made the decision to wait because it was what was right for you, so why do you need anyone else to validate that decision?

  24. krissylyn says:

    That’s just tacky and odd – no wedding guest wants to even think about the bride’s sex life – either way – virgin or prostitute – Odd to even think about it.

  25. Garnet Glitter says:

    lol lets see….add it to the wedding vows like,” Do you………, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to present your intact hymen only him to be deflowered on your wedding night,…..”

    or Have a trumpet blast and an announcement just before you walk down the aisle “Make Way For The Virgin Bride!”

    I particularly like the idea of the phallus in a circle with a slash across it like Ghost busters…paint it on a sign and have your flower girl carry that.

    Have printed in your wedding program…”After the honeymoon night all guests are welcomed to attend the ‘DeFlowering Party’ where the bridal sheets will be in display….come and toast the loss of the bride’s hymen to her husband!” Make sure you serve cherries jubilee

    Or print up in your wedding invites that the ceremony is Hymen friendly.

    Have the minister give you a Virginity badge, like a girl scout badge that you can sew on your gown…..

    , trashy, and rude as to ANNOUNCE your hymen is intact at your wedding…wow…..Your guests will re-act by finding it embarrassing, tasteless, tacky, rude, rather arrogant, self-serving and I guarantee WTF expressions will be rampant Why not just lift your skirts and SHOW them, it’s the same thing….jeeze louise.

  26. Suz123 says:

    As a wedding guest, I have no interest in bride and groom’s sex life . . . or the lack of one. As a wedding guest, I don’t want to hear about it. It is none of my business.

    It is inappropriate to announce your virginity at your wedding. Dare I use the word “tacky” here? Yes, it is tacky to announce your virginity at your wedding and/or wedding reception.

    As long as your groom knows you are a virgin, that is all that matters.

    You write: know so if you don’t agree with that decision then you answers aren’t really necessary
    My advice? If you don’t want varied opinions, then don’t post in a public forum.

  27. The Thriftmaster. says:

    This is the creepiest thing i’ve heard in a while. Who cares if you’re a virgin?! Why do you want everyone to know? Should we pin a ribbon on you or something?

    Tacky and classless. And i don’t use the word “tacky” lightly.

  28. Dimitra S says:

    I want to commend you on your decision and committment to yourslef and your fiance. Please do not listen to other people and their rude and unwarranted rants.

    The most important thing is to be true to yourself and what you and your fiance think is right.

    You could have the officiant say something or refer to it in your vows like suggested in other posts above.

    Good luck and all the best!

  29. PugMom says:

    You may be proud of that, and hey, good for you, but seriously inappropriate to announce to a room of your family and friends. Besides anyone that knows you, should already know that about you. It was completely inappropriate when it was announced at Simpson’s wedding, especially since her father was conducting the ceremony…double inappropriate. Your sexual experience or lack of should be kept between you, God and your fiance. You asked how can you do it? Well, there is no classy, tasteful way to do it, sorry, but that’s the truth.

  30. ♫GamerChick_Halo♥ says:

    Wow. Just like most people here are saying, don’t announce this.

    I’ve been to a fair share of weddings and if any of then announced that they were virgins etc. I would’ve been extremely uncomfortable and definitely don’t want to hear about it. Nobody at your wedding cares. The only person that should care is your husband, and he obviously knows, and that’s all that matters.

    You sound set on this idea, but you should really rethink this and stop being so stubborn. You’re on here asking for our opinions on this, and we’re telling you. Don’t do something like this because it’s ridiculous and you’re going to look stupid at your own wedding.

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