Do you have to have joint family wedding photo taken at wedding?

July 8th, 2011

My parents are none too fond of FMIL due to her crappy treatment of me and have had nothing to do with her. More importantly, they wonder if it is necessary that a joint pic be taken at the wedding of both families. FH and I planned to take pics of each family seperately and then we would each take a seperate pic with our respective families of origin. I haven’t asked him about not having joint wedding pic. If it matters any, my parents are paying for the whole wedding.what is the rule of etiquette on this?

11 Responses to “Do you have to have joint family wedding photo taken at wedding?”

  1. Tricia G says:

    Tell your parents to suck it up. It is two photographs. Your mom can suck up her disdain for the amount of time it takes for 2 photos.

    And those two photographs are not so much for you as they will be for your future 2.5 children to show their respective 2.5 children 30 years from now and say “here is a picture of my parents on their wedding day and all 4 of my grandparents.”

  2. CorpCityGrl says:

    We had a few taken, but not a lot–really just a handful of joint family photos. If you don’t want pictures like that taken, then don’t. It’s not really a rule of etiquette or anything though.

  3. Slightly Ravenous says:

    No. You don’t HAVE to do anything. We didn’t. Both our sets of parents are divorced so we took 4 separate “family” photos. Not a big deal at all.

  4. Perse says:

    No you don’t. Discuss with your photographer.

  5. Macy the Wedding Planner says:

    There is no need to do a joint family photo if there is no one who would buy it. Tell the photographer in advance that you do not want that photo.

  6. Allie says:

    no you dont have to have a family portrait.
    the only thing you have to have is a licence, officiant, and two wittnesses. the rest is up to you to do what you want to do with it.
    if your and his parents dont get along so badly that they cant stand to be in a picture together, dont take the picture! it will save alot of stress.

  7. melouofs says:

    You don’t HAVE to anything. However, this is a poor time for continuing hard feelings. It is honestly better for YOU and HTB if you all just grin and bear it. We don’t have to like everyone, but being civil is way better than creating a scene at your wedding right after vows have been exchanged. I can’timagine they can’t bring themselves to stand next to them for 3 minutes while a photo is taken.

  8. mary says:

    the pictures are what you get to take away from the wedding, after it is all said and done. So that is up to you and your fiance. If you both agree that you would like a joint family photo, than absolutely have one taken! All yours and his families have to do is stand there and smile for 10 seconds. They can put their personal feelings about the other family members aside for that moment.
    However, if you and your fiance don’t feel that this picture is important to you, than don’t have it taken.
    Even if your parents are paying for the wedding, these pictures are for you. So, you get out of your day what you want.

    Congrats on your engagement, and good luck with the rest of your wedding planning!

  9. Luv2Answer says:

    You can do whatever you want. Some weddings they do, others they don’t.

  10. truefirstedition says:

    You don’t HAVE to have any kind of photo taken at your wedding. If you and your fiance both agree that there’s no need for a big joint photo, that’s all that matters.

    Just tell your photographer that you’d like photos of the bride and groom together with each individual family, but not a large joint photo. Simple as that.

    And no, it doesn’t matter who is paying. If you don’t want and won’t display a joint family photo, just tell the photographer not to take one.

  11. I love my love says:

    it’s entirely up to you. if you’re paying the photog, he works for you and will shoot only what you tell him to. you may want to give him a heads up about the family tension in advance, so he doesn’t try to get both families in 1 shot. it’s best to plan out who you want in the photos and any special shots you want and tell the photog in advance.

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