Changed location of wedding with 3 weeks to go has feelings hurt and a stressed bride!!! Advice?

May 16th, 2011

My fiance and I are getting married in less than 3 weeks and had to change the location. We were going to get married in my sister’s back yard with an outside ceremony. The weather hasn’t been great lately and so we changed it to a community center close to where we live. The problem is that now my sister’s feelings are hurt and she’s my matron of honor.

We changed the location because of the weather and we didn’t have a backup plan in case in rained (we’re in FL). My sister said that we could move it inside her house, which is quite large, but will not hold 100 people and a DJ and a room for a dance floor. We were going to get a tent, but that wouldn’t cover everything and a bigger tent would be even more money.

Ultimately, I don’t know what to say to my sister. Any advice?

8 Responses to “Changed location of wedding with 3 weeks to go has feelings hurt and a stressed bride!!! Advice?”

  1. Jasmine808 says:

    Let her know that it wasn’t anything she did (or didn’t do) that made you change your mind. You would have loved to have the wedding at her house but with the weather — you needed to have a location that could accommodate the wedding.

    Don’t worry she’ll get over it 🙂

  2. Stimpson J. Cat says:

    Your sister needs to be more objective. Your reasoning was sound. I live in FL too and when I was planning my wedding, all the advice I read about outdoor weddings said to have a backup plan for bad weather. Your sister shouldn’t take it so personally. Tell her it will be easier for her in the end because she won’t have to worry about having her house clean, things being broken or damaged (especially if alcohol is involved), annoying the neighbors with the DJ’s music, and she won’t have to worry about cleaning up the next day.

  3. Pastor Art says:

    I also live in Florida where we’ve had rain nearly every day for over a month.

    You need to explain to your sister how much you appreciate the offer of getting married in her back yard, but unfortunately she can’t control the weather.

    Pastor Art

  4. wateronthered says:

    tell your sister it was nothing against her & her home. explain its your wedding and you want to be sure to have a spot in case weather does not cooperate. inside her home would be a good idea, but tell her it might not hold exactly what you would like and you dont want to make more work on her. she should understand.
    if she is still feeling her house is rejected, say you all can use it & have an after honeymoon party, where friends & family can get together to see pictures of the honeymoon, catch up on whats happened while you 2 were gone, etc.
    good luck on the wedding!

  5. Ms. X says:

    The responses above are all good ones. Explain your reasoning re. the weather to your sister. Add in what the other poster said about how your sister doesn’t have to worry about keeping her house real clean or anything getting broken if alcohol is served. And tell her to please don’t take it personally.

    After that, if your sister’s feelings are still hurt, she’s being over-sensitive which is not your problem. Your reasoning was sound, which you would have shared with her in a diplomatic way.

  6. indydst8 says:

    I would ask her what I could do in order to make her feel better but repeat again that it wasn’t something that she did that made you want to move the wedding. A friend has asked me not to get married in Florida, next year, because of the rain and the potential allergy issues. I laughed but the weather isn’t something you can count on to cooperate so it makes sense to have the wedding at the center and it will be less work for her post wedding as the guests won’t have made a mess at her place.

  7. navywife_2001 says:

    Your sister understands what it’s like in Florida! She knows it rains there constantly. Quite frankily, who wants to get married and have a reception when it’s wet outside? I wouldn’t. IF she chooses to act like that, then so be it. It’s your wedding, your venue, YOUR MONEY. Do what you feel is best.

  8. Terri says:

    She is not thinking correctly. 100 people would not be good in a house and your sister should realize that.

    However, your wedding date is three weeks away, how are you going to predict that it will rain on that day? Weathermen are NOT always correct!

    I would just use the community center as a back up and keep the wedding location at your sisters house outside.

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