Can you help me put things in perspective , because I feel like losing it?

May 15th, 2011

I come from an abusive family. But I took enough steps to get away from them as far as possible. But seems like I made a mistake recently , in that, i went out with this girl that used to like my brother and eventhough I knew how immature and promiscuous she was i kept going out with her because she represented the same dysfunctional construct me and my brother had with my mother.
We had to fight for her affection while growing up .
Recently I learned that this girl went back to my brother and went to 3rd base with him . I knew there was something terribly wrong with this girl the way she was behaving from the get go. But I was too stupid to not see the red flags. I am so down , because this is a kind of relationship I would have never got involved in , if it wasn’t for my brother involved in it ( i hope I am making some sense )

I found out what happened between she and him and i told her it’s over. Now 2 things are bugging me right now. First off,I am mad at myself for letting it go this far without seeing the red flags , because other than my brother , she also cheated on me with her own cousin ( i know it sounds like a country song ). I let it go ( i know i sound like an idiot with an IQ of 2 )

I broke up with this person, 2 days ago and my mind is literally out of balance. Since I live alone I don’t have many friends. My xgf , who I was with before her, is contacting me on a regular basis. But I don’t think she’ll be a good match for me since she spit on my face once for Not being there for her in my own apartment and cursed me out when I broke up with her..

I feel like such a loser and as if Noone needs me anymore. This is officially another low point in my life.
By the way , the girl and my brother lives in new york and i live in texas.

I met her few months ago when I went up there for a cousins wedding .
She knows a bit of my secret and my plans , so I am also worried if she’ll use that against me, eventhough I ended it with her in such a way that she won’t back stab in the future..

I am totally in a bind and have no road map . I am building up my social circle and trying to be more social inorder to not get into a deep depression. But I don’t know what to do . Please help me put things in perspective..

4 Responses to “Can you help me put things in perspective , because I feel like losing it?”

  1. Roshana Byanjankar says:

    I come from an abusive family. But I took enough steps to get away from them as far as possible. But seems like I made a mistake recently , in that, i went out with this girl that used to like my brother and eventhough I knew how immature and promiscuous she was i kept going out with her because she represented the same dysfunctional construct me and my brother had with my mother.
    We had to fight for her affection while growing up .
    Recently I learned that this girl went back to my brother and went to 3rd base with him . I knew there was something terribly wrong with this girl the way she was behaving from the get go. But I was too stupid to not see the red flags. I am so down , because this is a kind of relationship I would have never got involved in , if it wasn’t for my brother involved in it ( i hope I am making some sense )

  2. balieyy says:

    fuck her nobdy deserves tht. not even u

  3. need answers guy says:

    Shes’s a nasty cheating whore and she doesn’t deserve you. Go to a club or park and try to have some fun.

  4. Kyo~!! says:

    First off, it is not your fault! Seriously, if you can bring yourself to rise from the ashes of your parents negligence, then you are already doing really, really well. Personally, I wouldn’t be too worried about not seeing the warning signs. Love blinds people, even if its only for a short time. And the girl you are talking about obviously has no idea how to treat other people and also herself.

    I don’t think you should be too worried about the girl from the wedding. It sounds like she probably won’t do anything to hurt you or get back at you.

    I would keep being social and try to get out of the house and fill your time with fun things or self fulfilling things like going on hikes or walks, or even just goings swimming. you know, take your mind off of things and give you time to think.

    Don’t worry to much, things always have their ups and downs, but you seem like you’re trying to do things right and are a guy that has the strength and will to survive in this day and age.

    Also, if you ever need a little perspective, I’m always free to talk to, and there are a billion web sites where people can get good advice and not be judged, like forums and such. Send me a message if you need anything cleared up, and I hope this helps you out!

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