Can a promise ring be used as an engagement ring? What is the proper etiquette?

May 10th, 2011

To make it more understandable… I have been dating my old high school sweetheart for awhile now. When we were younger we had plans to get married and certain things broke us apart. Complete misunderstanding on both our parts and as high schoolers we never really talked about it. It broke both of our hearts. He went his way and I went mine. We found our way back to each other after all these years. We are more in love now. We live together and are raising our children together. He constantly tells me that he will marry me and even has me looking through jewelry catalogs for rings. He wants to be sure I get something I would like because I’m going to be the one wearing it. Completely understandable. Thing is I really am very simple when it comes to things like that. I like tiny jewelry so when I seen some of the promise rings, I told him that is what I wanted. he said that isn’t quite what he was looking for. He wants to get me an official engagement ring. I told him I really don’t like the look of them and wanted simple and really not expensive. So, can a promise ring be used as an engagement ring? I’m that’s what I want shouldn’t that count? We are planning on getting matching wedding bands and again just simple with that too.

10 Responses to “Can a promise ring be used as an engagement ring? What is the proper etiquette?”

  1. Slightly Ravenous says:

    A ring is just a symbol, so any ring can symbolize anything you want. A promise ring or any ring can be used as an engagement ring. You will still be just as engaged regardless of what kind of ring you have.

  2. rachachamonster says:

    You can use any ring for an engagement ring. The jewelry companies want you to spend more so they tell you that you need a specific ring. As long as you love it, that is all that matters.

  3. Blunt says:

    A ring is a ring, there is no etiquette about it. You can use whatever you want as an engagement symbol.

    Good luck

  4. *PrincessPraise* says:

    You can have whatever you want for your engagement ring.There is nothing wrong with him wanting to splash out on you a little.There is something about a man (probably male pride lol) that says “i must get her the most fancy diamond engagment ring)because at the end of the day,others are going to ask you to see the ring and if it isn’t dazzling then the responsibility comes down on him!!!

    But to me its more about sentiment and what it means to the both of you,you are the one who has to wear it everyday and look at it every single day and you will not enjoy looking at it if its something which you are not used to or it is not your style.

    But look there are thousands of styles and there are some more traditional engagement rings with just a tiny stone or a few little diamonds to give it the wow factor ,so you could go for the best of both worlds!!!

    I hope this helps

  5. Sausage Mahoney says:

    An engagement ring is a ring that a man gives a woman when he proposes (or they pick out together afterward) Whatever ring is chosen to signify that engagement is an engagement ring. It doesn’t matter what the jewelry store labels the ring as, it’s an engagement ring if and only if it’s used as one.

  6. Gypsy says:

    It doesn’t really matter – have you seen some of the engagement rings the Hollywood people are wearing now? Not that they matter, but my point is that a lot of them don’t have the traditional diamond ring for their engagement ring, and you don’t have to either. If he wants to get you an “official engagement ring”, maybe you can find one that has a plain band, and a very small diamond – check out zales, kay, belden, michael’s, etc. I know Zales has a design your own option, and I’m pretty sure Kay has some really small stone rings that you might like.

  7. The Original GarnetGlitter says:

    ANY ring can be used as an e-ring.

    When my husband proposed he presented me with an atypical ring…a bypass with his birthstone and mine…there are diamonds in the ring but as accent stones.

    I was not ready to commit so he asked me to wear it in friendship & with the promise to ‘give him a chance’….when I was ready to say yes we used it as an e-ring.

    I love the ring so much I was willing to wear it as my wedding band but he wanted something more traditional so we got matching plain polished yellow gold bands.

    Arthritis has made it difficult to wear the ring on my ring finger and it can not be sized because of the setting so he has gifted me with rings I can wear as e-rings….only two are diamonds..the other are gemstones with diamonds as accents only. My fav among them is HIS birthstone surrounded by champagne diamonds.

    Do what feels right for you.

  8. truefirstedition says:

    Any ring can be used as an engagement ring – or you don’t have to use a ring at all! The size, style, and materials of the ring are completely up to you and him.

  9. Sapphirebullet says:

    Any ring can be used as an engagement ring. My engagement ring is a diamond between two sapphires. It’s simple and very me but my husband didn’t find it in the engagement ring section of our favorite jeweler.
    I will caution you against using a traditional promise ring. Promise rings are generally made of poor quality materials – that’s why they are so inexpensive. The target market for promise rings is teenagers without means or understanding of jewelry.

  10. bostonGKR says:

    Engagement rings are not even a requirement to be engaged. All you need to be “engaged” is a solid promise that you will get married on a certain date.

    So, anything you want to use as an engagement ring is perfectly acceptable. Diamond ring, sapphire ring, a “wedding band”-style ring, old promise ring, plastic ring from a toy machine, twist tie … whatever. It’s also perfectly acceptable to forego an engagement ring and just wear a wedding band, or not even wear any rings at all.

RSS feed for comments on this post. And trackBack URL.