A different kind of wedding – can you help?

March 26th, 2010

Hi there. We’re starting to plan our wedding and we’re realizing that we want something quite different from the typical weddings you see. Below is a short list of what we envision.

– About 150 people
– No wedding party (we don’t like the idea of other people having to fork out the $ for clothes, etc.) but we will have my niece as flower girl.
– Typical white wedding dress for me
– Photos taken before ceremony
– Ceremony in evening immediately followed by reception, including DJ and dancing.
– No tables at reception – just various lounging areas (couches, etc.), a playstructure or bouncy-castle for the kids, and lots and lots of hors d’oeuvres, drinks and desserts.
– No speeches, except maybe one by us to thank the guests.

Has anyone ever heard of a wedding like this? Is anything really wrong about it? I am trying to find resources on the internet to help me out but I’m not finding much. Please suggest anything you can.
Wow, all of you guys are seriously freakin’ nice! Haha. Thanks for all your great comments, they have really given me the confidence to go with my ideas. I’m sure there will be some criticizers, but there always are. And I know that my Mom will be 100% for it so that will help a lot! Thanks again!!!

21 Responses to “A different kind of wedding – can you help?”

  1. Kelly R says:

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with what you’ve got there. Sounds really nice and laid back. Just remember, your wedding should be what you and your fiance want! Best wishes!

  2. Samantha1029 says:

    No theres nothing wrong with it. It’s simple but memorable. Personally more ppl should have wedding’s like this. Try to find a place that rents out big rooms. Not like a reception place. It’s cheaper and there wont be the tables and stuff. Then just rent a few couches or plush chairs for the room and get some pretty decorations.
    Otherwise, you can do it like at a park. That way theres the play areas for the kids and its simple and beautiful. Good luck and congrats

  3. PokerFaced says:

    I think it sounds fantastic. There’s a time in a person’s life when they have to go to a whole bunch of weddings and it gets really tiresome, so I’m glad that you’re trying to break the mold!

    It sounds like you have the guests’ comfort in mind, so just make sure that the refreshments and lounge areas are sufficient. Some people might be really hungry by the time of the ceremony, so keep that in mind. Also, it’s 150 people, so maybe you should assign areas anyway, to reduce chaos!

    Since you’re taking the photos beforehand, why not have all the guests come by that time too and do a shoot with everyone? Also, you can make it less traditional by hiring a fashion photographer and doing fun, action shots instead of the usual static ones at weddings.

    And don’t skimp on the cake. Everyone loves the cake.

  4. Laura says:

    Sounds like the perfect wedding. I may want to steal your idea one day! = )

  5. olderwiser100 says:

    sounds like a good plan to me. casual, yet classy. stick with your ideas, they will work.

  6. Starsky says:

    I think your wedding is going to be a blast. There is nothing wrong with your ideas and your wants for a wedding. It should like a great and fun idea for your special day. Call local bouncy-bouncy places in your area and for them say its a childs birthday instead of a wedding because they will most likely say that they don’t do weddings. Look at local venues and tell them your ideas. They should be able to accomadate your needs if not tell them that you will go to a local party store or rental company to get the coachs and whatever else you need as long as they will rent the pass to you for the day. If you are doing the rental company be there when they bring in the coaches so you can tell them where you want them to be placed. (Make sure you have the rental company do the work its worth the money and you don’t have the added headache to your special occasion.

  7. Green_eyes 69 says:

    That’s simaler to what I am doing what im finding is that you have to plan it your self and rent a hall that will allow the to bring in your own food

  8. mary catherine m says:

    to be honest sound quiet like mine exept no bouncy castle they didnt need it they werent bored,we had a band and a dj just so there woud be music throuth the bands breaks
    it sound very like a scotish wedding!

  9. Donna I says:

    I think your ideas sound great. Weddings should be free-form. You can still have a wedding party, tho, without making them wear matching outfits. For my first wedding, my sisters picked the fabric & made themselves dresses using patterns of their choice (so they could each choose something that they knew flattered their widely differing body types, but the fabric would be the same), and for my second wedding, the bridesmaids (and I) wore flowered dresses – again, each of their own choosing, but this time, not even matching material (it was a springtime/garden wedding). They each sent me a photo or a fabric swatch ahead of time and my friend who was doing the flowers matched their bouquets to their outfits. It was fun and lovely and included them in the ceremony.

  10. ninthnarnian says:

    Congratulations! If your love is more than ordinary your wedding should be too. Use your imagination and make your wedding celebrate who you and your fiance are. Have fun!

  11. kiki says:

    That actually sounds *exactly* like my wedding LOL (we will have tables though for eating).

    We’re in the 21st century now girl, and that whole saying of “it’s your day” actually is true.

    Sounds like a good plan to me (but I’m biased, since I’m doing the same thing- nixing the speeches, bridal party, etc).


  12. Pink Denial says:

    What you’re picturing isn’t too uncommon. A few things to keep in mind, though…

    You should have at least one attendant each, because you need witnesses. Since you’ll only have the one gal, she can pick whatever she wants to wear.

    You can’t always have an evening ceremony. Many churches don’t do weddings at night, so you might have to hire a justice of the peace to perform the ceremony.

    If your reception goes longer than 2 hours, you need real food. Not just hors d’oeuvres, drinks, and dessert. If you’re providing real food, then you need some tables where people can eat.

  13. Henry or Brooke O says:

    That sounds like a wonderful, relaxing wedding. It might be hard to find a venue with couches instead of tables AND that will let you have a bouncey-castle or a play area, but they’re out there. You just have to find one.

  14. CBT Princess says:

    Check out Offbeat Bride – http://offbeatbride.com/
    for ideas – I think you can have anything you want for your wedding – they have groups you can join and people that will help you there. congrats & good luck!

  15. iloveweddings says:

    Hi and congratulations on your upcoming wedding!

    Your wedding sounds GREAT. And, NO, there is certainly nothing wrong with it. You can do as you please. It sounds really fun! I love all the non-typical things you are having, especially the lounging areas….that is really different.

    You have good ideas and great taste!

  16. KMONEY831 says:

    I had a somewhat similar wedding, I got married late in the evening, strategically after the dinner hour, I had some tables but not a lot, I did get some of those tall cocktail tables that you can stand at and put your drink and purse on, and we wanted to do the couchs but couldn’t find a reasonable place to rent them. We had a full hosted bar and a great DJ so everyone danced all night, we got some hors d’oeuvres but not too many because we were not trying to feed everyone a meal. Reception started at 8pm, the bouncy house is a good idea if a lot of kids are going to go to the wedding but most people leave their kids at home when an event is that late at night. If you do it any earlier you will have to serve dinner. We didn’t plan on any speeches but half way through the evening a lot of friends and family took over the mike because they had had a little too much to drink. We only had our first dance which half way through I had the bridal party start dancing with us. I skipped all the other dances because they are boring! We cut the cake and did a shot for the toast. We skipped all the boring formal stuff because it did not fit our personalities and vision of our wedding. It was such a fun wedding people still tell us how much fn it was almost 4 years later!

    Do what you guys want its your day!

  17. Kathleen says:

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with your idea for your wedding. In fact, I think it’s great that you are planning something for the kids to do. You might also want to consider having some kid friendly hors d’oeuvres or hot dogs and sandwiches for them plus milk, juice, water, soda as well. As far as where to have it, I would check out reception sites, explain what you want to do and see if they can do it. Your best bet would probably be some place unusual instead of the usual reception hall. Some ideas would be a flower conservatory, an aquarium, an art museum, an historic home, or even a theater.

  18. bountifiles says:

    Perfect! My website has sample ceremonies, feel free to use what ever you like. http://www.churchofancientways.org

    Tents are great to both provide shade and protect in case of rain.

    The bouncy people will have connections to other rentals. Some caterers come with staff, tables, chairs, linen, & cutlery. Some don’t so remember to ask.

    You may also want to consider the bathroom situation. Do you have sewers or a cesspool? Porta-san’s are nice these days and when it comes to a mess like that it’s always better safe than sorry!

  19. Steph says:

    Sound great.
    Some suggestions though; make sure there is enough seating for everyone and let the guests know it will be a cocktail reception (rather than full meal).
    Oh, and if people are lounging why not put in a few low tables with cushions around them eg:
    and maybe some tents for shade or rain if it is outdoors:

  20. OZZIEGAL says:

    sweetie it sounds lovely. first of all congrats on the wedding! secondly congrats on not being one of the million bride-zillas that are out there. its refreshing to hear of someone being concerned about their guests and their attendants! and someone wanting children at their wedding!
    there is nothing wrong with your plans! they sound great! whether your reception is an hour or five hours the idea of hor d’oeuvres, desserts and drinks is perfect! it fits right into your entire scenario! please don’t get talked into a full meal thing! i imagine this is a wedding that folks will be bragging about and copying for some time to come! you are going to have a beautiful wedding day and i wish you a lifetime of happiness!

  21. Alexandra B says:

    I agree weddings are sooo expensive! We wanted to have a wedding that was tasteful but not too expensive. In the end we hired a big house privately rather than a wedding venue and catered ourselves. It was much more informal and being during the summer we had beautiful grounds. One thing I wouldn’t skimp on personally is a wedding videographer – we hired a company called Bloomsbury Films whose created a really personal film with messages from all our guests! Last time I looked they still had a sample of our wedding video on their website http://www.bloomsburyweddings.com/civil.html.

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